Adriel told me to change this bit...so I am...right now...look, it's changing as I type...wow, isn't that some warped stuff...I'll have to have a bit of a lie down now, that's just how warped and freaky that is...
 
               But first, a fun story about a dog:

         There was once a happy little dog called Pilbort The Viking, and Pilbort liked to rape and pillage, and throw axes at people. He also enjoyed being patted on the head by his owner, Mr Spank.
         One day, Pilbort was walking down the street, when he came across a can of soup, "Yum!" said Pilbort, "I like soup!" and so he ate the soup, can and all.
          "Oh deary me!" said Dr Bliff, Pilbort's friend, "That's distasteful, how can you eat country vegetable soup!?"
          "Country Vegetable?!" said Pilbort, "Oh darn, I hate that variety of soup! I hope I can get rid of it before the can dissolves!"
          "Of course, yes indeed!" said Dr Bliff, "Now how can we extricate that can from your body?"
          So Pilbort and Dr Bliff went to talk to Mr Spank, and asked him how they could get Pilbort to throw up the can of soup, "Oh, hello Pilbort, and Dr Bliff! I'm not really sure how to get cans of soup out of dogs," said Mr Spank, "Maybe you could have it surgically removed ?"
          "Good idea! Thankyou Mr Spank." said Pilbort, and promtly did so.
          "Hearty Beef Stew!?" Said Dr Bliff, "I was under the impression it was vegetable!"
          "Oh, darn! Now nobody will be able to enjoy the beefy goodness!" said Pilbort, and he strapped Dr Bliff and Mr Spank to a chair, doused them in petrol, and set them on fire.
                                                    THE END.

            A picture of my very favourite man, Robert Smith of the Cure.
 
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